TO: Men all over the planet
RE: I'm not a stalker. Really.
DATE: January 11, 2010
Update: After receiving a rather disturbing comment, I just want to make it clear that the lovely Facebook Flirt inspired this MEMO. xoxo
If you like someone, let them know... If you Love somone, let it show... Don't hide those feelings, let yourself go...
So what do you think of that quote? Boys, boys, boys. You've got my head spinning these last few days, and I'm not talking about that good feeling I'm assuming comes with a first kiss. Now, I've always prone to being perpetually mysified by your interesting behavior, but this one? Well, frankly, it just takes the cake.
I suppose my question, really, is this: Why do you tend to become glassy eyed and run when I hit a certain friendly threshold with you?
Since when did friendly becoming the new stalking or being an all-around creepster?
*Am I that intimidating?
*Am I that repulsive?
*Am I that utterly threatening to you?
I've been making a conscious effort in the last few months to be more friendly, be more outgoing with you - not in a romantic way, just a friend way - but it's obviously had the exact opposite effect. Oh, the number of times I've been at my utmost friendly, given you a friendly smile, only to have give me that look of being awkwardly uncomfortable in return.
I've seen other women do the same thing to you, and you adore it like a dog adores a new squeeze toy.
So what gives? What is it about me?
Or, is it my disability that's scaring you again? I'm starting to think that's what it is. I don't think you've gotten the memo, but let me be the first to open your eyes: We women with disabilities are people too. See, I'm thinking that you're thinking my friendliness is an attempt to woo you. Here's what I imagine is going through your mind:
"Hmmm, this girl is friendly. Interesting."
"Oh hey, she's actually talking to me. I am so the man."
"OMG, what's that thing? A wheelchair?"
"Uh-oh, she's being awfully friendly to me."
"Oh no, she's being friendly because she wants me. Like really, really wants me. "
"I have to run. I have to get out of here. I can't date a woman with a disability. I can't marry her. How will I care for her? Will we have kids? What am I getting myself into here? HEEEEEELP!"
Whoa, boys. Slow down. Just because I'm being nice to you doesn't mean I want you - don't flatter yourself. And it doesn't mean we're going to get married and that you're going to be saddled with taking care of me the rest of your life.
At least have enough decency and respect for me and all women. I may not act tough, but you know what? Those words you spoke - or failed to speak - hurt. Even if only a little bit. And I won't lie and pretend they didn't. Maybe I shouldn't feel this way, but I do. The heart can't help how it feels, can it?
And what's with all this caring about what friends think? It's an excuse - a lame one, at that. It's nothing but mumbo jumbo. Mumbo jumbo of the worst kind, indeed. It's not hot; actually, it's sort of sad. Following the crowd is a downright turn-off. Would you rather pacify your friends than hurt someone's feelings?
I know you can do better, boys. I know you can.
Did you ever think that my being nice and friendly and charming is, well, just that? I'm a friendly person. I like to laugh, and I've noticed in the last few months that I'm becoming quite the fetching flirt. An added perk, I'm assuming.
Maybe it's not really your fault. Maybe you're just powerless when it comes to my bewitching ways. I knew it would happen someday. I've always said I'm a late bloomer.
So you know what my plan is? I'm not changing. Nope. I'm going to continue to be nice because, boys, that's just the kind of woman I am. If you don't like it, well, frankly, that's just tough luck.
In the future, I'd appreciate it if you didn't make me feel so stupid and feel like such a fool for doing something as simple and harmless as being nice.
The bottom line: A friendly woman should not be threatening to you. Period. As always, thank you, boys. xoxo
[Photos via Audrey Hepburn Complex]